I'm tired. The type of tired that going to bed doesnt help. The type of tired that when I lay down all I want to do is get back up and work on the house, or finish my to do list. The type of tired that when I have time to do stuff, I dont have the energy. Living this new life is harder than I ever imagined and I have never felt so alone. I work so hard on trying to find the positive and sometimes it feels like its not there.
I wish that I could be the happy cheerful glass half full person that I feel like I am supposed to be. But right now that person keeps eluding me. I wonder what is so wrong with me that I cant seem to make and keep friends. What do I do so wrong? Is it that I am too friendly? Is it that I like doing things and being there for my friends? Is it that my life is just too complicated and people dont know what to say? I miss having girl friends. I miss being able to go out to lunch or dinner. I miss having a shoulder to cry on. I miss being able to share good news and laugh. I miss leaning on each other.
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